If Nothing Changes

When it comes to our health, fitness, financial, and relationship goals, if nothing changes, nothing changes. So often I’ll have clients come to me when it comes to weight loss and fitness, and they’re so frustrated and they’ll say to me, “Man, I work out all the time, I eat great and nothing’s changing. And then we take some time to look over their diet or their work-out routines, maybe they aren’t doing everything they think they’re doing, a lot of times it comes down to not tracking properly or just assuming they’re doing well. 

It also applies to so many other areas of life. See, when we think about what it is we wanna accomplish, whether it’s our health and fitness, financial, whether it’s relationally, we all have things that get in our way. We all have challenges. We all have excuses. And the reality of it is, all of us, every single one of us could use any one of our excuses and paint them into a beautiful picture. Now, as you’re reading this you might think, “Oh yeah, it’s easy for you to say it, but you don’t know”. You know what, I don’t know, but I do know I have a couple of heroes, these two women were over 65 years old.

One was a widow and one was a divorcee. They spent their lives raising their family and they were not independently wealthy, but they decided it was time to do something for themselves, and they decided it was time to remove the excuses that had kept them from going for the things that they wanted in life. 

So they made a commitment to their health and fitness and learning something new, and they started training with me in martial arts. Now you would think that would be the end. But first off, in order for them to succeed there, they had to find a way to be able to afford it, so they had additional jobs outside of their retirement.

But it doesn’t stop there.

65 years old, I wanna say around the ages of 66 and 67, each of them went through some pretty significant health issues, one of the women had cancer. She ended up having to have one kidney removed and half of her lung. Now, if there is ever a good reason not to work out, being in your late 60s with half a lung and a kidney removed, I think go to the top of the charts in most people’s minds. She refused to allow that excuse to hold her back from what she wanted. When life says you’re at that age, it’s time for you to sit back and relax and blah, blah, blah…….

She was like, hell no. She was gonna go for it.

The other woman had severe back issues and needed back surgery to fuse her back together properly. But neither of them ever quit it. And 10 years later, they went on to earn third degree black belts. Not an easy feet. They were still working out multiple times a week, and they continue to go. They don’t quit, they don’t give up. See, I don’t know what your excuse or challenges or the thing that you’re struggling with.

http://alexandriadimond.com

All I know is if you want it bad enough, you’ll find a way. When I started martial arts at 16 years old, my family couldn’t afford to pay for our karate lessons and my mom’s rule was the only way we could do it is if all of us could do it. That was my my mom, brother, sister and I… While I could baby sit and afford to pay for my portion, there was no way I could afford to pay for all of us. So we went out and we found a family paper route. A one-time a week route that we all did together, and it came to just enough a month to pay for our Martial Arts classes.

If you want it bad enough, you will find a way, you will overcome your own excuses. So my challenge for you is to take a moment, go somewhere quiet and private, whether it’s today or this evening, and write down the things that are in your way when it comes to accomplishing the things you want to accomplish, whether it’s health and fitness, financial, relationship, etc. Be honest with yourself, don’t be like, Yeah, well, this is never gonna change. No, write it out. I’m not saying it’s gonna change over night, but the first thing you have to do is address the issue. If your challenge in order to hit your financial goals is you don’t make enough money every month, then write it down. You have to address it first, write down exactly how short you are every month, so that you can specifically pinpoint it. If your challenge is you wanna start working out more, but you just don’t have the time. We’ll… Where is the time going?

I’m not saying that maybe those reasons or excuses or gonna be bigger hurdles to overcome, but it’s not until you address them that you can start making significant changes to be where you wanna be.

So that’s my challenge for you.

http://alexandriadimond.com

A Letter From A Homeschooling Mom

2020 has been a whirlwind for the whole world. A year ago, none of us could have imagined how much our daily way of life would have changed. Now, it’s clear these changes are not going anywhere anytime soon. They affect most aspects of life, including our children’s education. 

Homeschooling allowed flexibility for a road trip to visit my parents and brother.

With many towns and communities choosing to offer remote or hybrid options parents have found themselves suddenly having to adjust to a life as a “homeschooling parent”. Now parents have to figure out how to juggle work, work from home (if possible), and fitting it all in as a homeschooling parent. I can’t imagine how that is possible, wait, yes I can, because I have done that with my sons. 

Now, don’t get me wrong, I totally understand that there is MAJOR difference between choosing to homeschool your children and creating a plan to balance work responsibilities versus having no choice in the matter or having a job that this new system does not work with. 

I decided to homeschool my sons when they were entering 2nd and 6th grade. Having been homeschooled myself it was a decision I was comfortable with. During this time as a homeschooling mom I also built multiple 6 figure businesses with both remote and physical locations. 

I share this to let you know, while this may have not been your plan, it is possible. It is possible to create a plan that will work best for your family. Let me share some lessons I learned along my journey. 

  1. Breathe. Relax. Let Go.         So schooling & work look nothing like you pictured they would. That is ok. In order to not have every moment of this process stress you out, you need to let go of the image you thought it should be. Your child is not attending school in the traditional format you envisioned. They will still get an amazing education. They may learn things they would not have learned in a classroom and there may be things they would have learned in a classroom they will be weak in. That is ok. People can learn in all sorts of different settings. A child does not need to be in a classroom from 9am – 3pm in order to get a good education. 
  2. Don’t Compare Yourself to Other Moms/Dads                   I am seeing a lot of cool Pinterest worthy posts of neat home set ups some families have made. Maybe you have done something like this, maybe you have not. Either option is ok. You are not failing if you do not. It’s easy to get distracted and mom/dad guilt yourself. Your most important focus needs to be what works best for your family. Personally, I was never the kind to put cute stuff like that together. It took me a long time to stop comparing myself to others. Don’t waste your energy on that. You have enough going on right now. 
  3. Don’t Complain About Remote/Hybrid Around Your Children.                Kids want nothing more than to please their parents and elders (even if they don’t always act it), they also pick up their emotional cues from the adults around them. If they hear you complaining about how this is an inconvenience or  how it will make a big financial stress, they will feel guilty. They will feel like they are a burden or “pain”. If they hear you complaining about how difficult or ineffective the model is, they will begin to feel that stress and frustration themselves and it will carry into their performance in school. Teaching kids in martial arts for over 20 years, I would often have parents come to me confused as to why their child seemed to suddenly want to quit. Sitting down with the parent and child more often than not it was because the child heard parents discussing or arguing over money. They felt if they quit then mom and dad would not be as upset. It’s important to remember what we say around our children impacts how they view things. 
  4. Support Teachers and School Leaders In Any Way You Can.                    This is unchartered territory for everyone. Everyone’s lives have been turned upside down. Everyone is learning as they go. Technical and internet issues happen to everyone. Have patience and work as a team to navigate these waters. 
  5. Find Ways to Supplement Learning.                                                              Find activities to supplement learning at home. Simple things like cooking, cleaning, gardening, or even grocery shopping teaches valuable life skills. I used to have my boys sit in on my business meetings, team trainings, meetings with the CPA, and even attorneys to allow them to learn about those things. I would always include a conversation after about what we did and why what we did was important. 
  6. Enjoy the Blessing.                                                                            While these changes are frustrating, scary, and for some completely life changing, the opportunity to be more hands on in your child’s education and daily development is such a blessing. Time flies, your children will be grown on their own before you know it. You will look back and cherish the memories made during this time. 

Every family is a little different and what works best for them will be different too. For me, I would often work on my office work while my boys worked on their lessons. Other times, they would be doing lessons in the backseat of the car while we traveled between locations. Other days they would be doing lessons while I taught classes or met with clients. Whatever works best for you and your family is the best way.  Don’t worry about standardized tests. Make sure your child gets their best education with the resources you have available. Plus, there are SO many great educational resources just a google away (my mom did not have that when she homeschooled us). 

You got this.

Great Deal On Play Doh on Amazon (click image)
Stock Up On Printer Paper (click image)
Craft Supply Kit (click image)

Closing Time

Who remains when the lights go out. 

I recall in great detail the first time I experienced an intense sense of community outside of my family. When working at McCoy’s Action Karate. I was an awkward child and teen and never “really” fit in anywhere. Now as a 21 year old, with a 2 year old, buying her first home I finally experienced it. I had been an instructor there for a few years at that point and had developed some amazing friendships. As a housewarming gift they had come together and got a gift card so I could get my first washer and dryer. Community, saw a young family and a need and found a way to help fill it. Community is not only about needs being met, it’s the 2 hour conversations in the parking lot, crying on a shoulder, the person who brings a coffee, those who played with my boys while I taught. It was me, watching their families grow. 

My second experience with community was when I first opened my own school. Students rallied around and cheered on. I recall standing on the back deck of one of those students home watching everyone in my community playing volleyball. My heart felt like it could explode seeing everyone come together. 

I got to be part of people’s every day and the major milestones. I sat with them when they cried about life challenges. I celebrated Victories and unfortunately even paid respect as some passed away. 

But what happens to the leader when the show is over, when the tour is cancelled, when the house lights come back on? What happens to that community, to those who the leaders and family loved. What happens to the friends you made? The ones you shared so many memories with? What happens to your children’s friends? Where do they go? Do they forget you? No one ever prepares you for that part. You think that community, those friends will last forever. 

I recall the last time we all sat in a room together. The people I considered my inner circle, my community, the ones I would do anything in my power for. I finally after years found the confidence to open up, to share something I had never shared before. It was the last time I saw many of them. 

Unanswered messages, ignored comments, realization that the community you had was no more. Watching as they moved on and continued to nurture the relationships you helped create, with genuine pride and joy to see… all the while your heart breaking wondering if it could have been different. I thought we would be friends & community forever.

Where had they gone,

My mind flashed back to 20 years before, a church I had been attending decided to replace the pastor. His daughter stood up and asked how… how could this be for the man that had officiated the churches weddings, funerals and been there for everyone during our best and worst days. Counseled through major life moments or just enjoy a mid week coffee. Over 20 years for some people, seeing and spending every Sunday, Wednesday and days in between with him. How could they abandon him now? I found myself now, fully understanding what she asked. How, how could they forget him so easily? How could that church or people he loved just forget him and his family? Why did it have to be all or nothing? 

I recall a leader in the martial arts industry the committed suicide years ago. The details are not important in this example, but a friend who had been close to me at the time asked “why didn’t he talk to me” “ how did I not know”. The person had lost his community, his purpose, and in this case the only option he saw was to take his life. 

Another close friend of mine (who also was a pastor) went through a similar change about the same time I did. The people he loved and cared on so quickly forgot when it was not longer convenient  for them to do so. We shared how painful it had been and how much we had to grow during that time. Seeing the path we had invested so much into disappear in front of us. Suddenly those same people, the ones we cared for and loved, believed the worst of us. All that we had done in the past meant nothing now that we where gone. 

Don’t get me wrong, when I lost it all, everything I worked for was gone, and my community….. forgot me. There where still a couple friends who stood by and checked in on me. One friend in particular, of all people had the most reason to hate me, yet she didn’t. She saw past all that had happened. Being closest to the fire she knew all the details. When I wanted to give up and thought all was lost, she was there for me, she probably saved my life. 

I recently listened to an audio on Audible “Everything is F*cked” a book by Mark Manson. The title can be distracting, but this book dives deep into human behavior. It goes over our basic human need to be part of a tribe or community. It was key to helping me find peace in how things had changed, understanding my pain and how it reacted to a greater human need. My pain was not unusual or misplaced. We all have a deep need for community, to belong in a place where our personality, skill sets, and contributions matter. 

Maybe you are a leader or someone who lost their community and understands this pain. Maybe as you read this you think of a friend, teacher, pastor, coach, etc., who was part of your community once that you lost track of. I have learned that our tribe may change as our life goes on, we learn this at an early age (pre school, elementary school, high school, college). A reminder, that as great as that pain may be, you can eventually find a new tribe. That tribe may not be a forever tribe, and that is ok too. We all change over time, it should not be surprising our tribes may change too. 

Like the song “Closing Time” by Semisonic. “You don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here” 

Check out the book I reference here, https://amzn.to/2XcTbj8

The Bitter Pill

I wanted to share something I heard in a podcast yesterday by the Ziglar Foundation. If you follow Zig Ziglar, you’re probably probably very familiar with the story as it’s probably one of his most famous examples of things that happened at his events. 

He talks about how he was at an event one day they had like a Q and A time after that people could come talk to him and ask him questions about the event. He said, one day he was standing there and this woman came barreling up the center aisle towards him. And he said, man, she had fire in her eyes. That woman was angry and she got over to him and, and said “Mr. Zigler, I got to talk to you”, and he’s like, “well, how can I help you ma’am.” She responds, “I got to tell you, you’re telling me how to make my life better. Well, you don’t understand” she said, “the job I work is awful. The people are awful. My boss is just miserable. The workload is horrible. Man if you worked where I worked, you would understand. There is no way what you taught me today can have any benefit. It doesn’t apply to my situation.” So they talked and he goes, “well, ma’am, I’m going to challenge you. I’m gonna challenge you for the next 40 days.

He goes on to say, “every day when you get home from work and your responsibilities for the day are done, taking care of the kids, making dinner, and before bedtime, I want you to find a quiet spot and I want you to go by yourself and write down a list of all the things that you love about where you work.” She scoffed at him. “Did you not hear me? I told you where I work is awful. It’s horrible. There was nothing good there.” Zig’s like, “well ma’am I want you to do this exercise before we talk about what your next move should be.” She replies, “Mr. Ziglar. You are not listening to me.” He goes, “give me one, give me one thing that you like, what’s one benefit of your job.” Well, she got all upset and replied, “well, you know, they do pay me all right.” “Open up your notebook” He said, “write that down“. And she just gave him a look like, are you kidding me? And he say’s, “ma’am I can’t help you.If you aren’t going to take the action. If you’re not going to do what I’m asking you to do today, he said, then we’re done.” 

And she just got all upset and they sat down and as they started, they paid her on time. She had a 401k and profit share options, full benefits and four week package of vacation. And by the time they had sat down and gone over some of the things she liked about her job, they had come up with over 40 things that were benefit to her position in her job. And she went home and did what Mr. Ziglar said and continued every day to write down the things that had happened that day, the thing she was grateful for for that job. When she came back to the next event, she was like, “Mr. Ziglar, you would not believe the changes.”

The people are just so much more pleasant. The workload is so much more easier, man. I enjoy going to work everyday. You would not believe how much has changed about where I work.” Do you really think what changed was where she worked or do you think what changed was her attitude about her circumstances? The way she viewed her every single day. See the reality of it is we all have things that we could be just so ungrateful for things that are unfair things that just aren’t right. And if we told some horror story, let me tell you, they would be like, I can’t believe it. You’re right. That is not right. That’s not fair. Just like that woman thought was going to happen. When she came up to Mr. Ziglar, she thought she was going to sit down and tell him, and he’d be like, Oh my goodness, How do you even tolerate those people? 

And instead she was given life changing advice about bitterness. See, we all struggle with bitterness. We all struggle with moments of things, just being unfair, but it’s how we decide to handle them that make a difference.

Now, I myself went through one of the most devastating things in my life a few years ago, I had to with almost no notice, shut down both of my businesses. 

That was my life’s work, 19 years of heart, soul, and sacrifice. And I literally had nothing to show for it. I have had moments where the anger and the bitterness towards the people who put me in that position, who lied to me, whose lack of integrity, put me in a situation that was just not fair has wanted to consume me.

There have been moments almost daily where I get bitter and angry, looking at people who get to go on and do what I love to do because of my work. And I instead now have to pick up the pieces of my life, but see, I have a choice every single time that those emotions come over me. I have a choice to let them consume me and let me keep them in this place of darkness or I have a choice to be grateful for what I do have because of those changes. And I have to remind myself daily that I have so much to still be grateful for. And that, yes, this is heartache. This is painful, but it’s also a season of life, a change. You know, I never pictured it in a million years that I’d be doing a writing about my company’s closing, but I am. Things just did.

And I could give you a compelling story about all the reasons it was unfair and not right, or I can say, okay, what’s next? And those are my choices. If I decide to live in that place of bitterness, if I decide to live in that place of anger and it’s not fair and, and focusing on other people, then I will never move forward in life. But if I make the choice to everyday be grateful for the things I do have. If I’d make a choice every day to redesign my own future, then I have a future to redesign. And we all have these opportunities in life. We all have the chance to not take the bitter pill to not live in a place of it’s not fair. 

Every day, we have an opportunity to think about all the things we have to be grateful for. And as challenging as that time of life had been for me, there is still so many amazing things that I had in my life every day. I have my sons. I have an amazing guy who has stood by my side during the worst days of my life. If I spend my time focusing on all the things I don’t have, then that I’m going to miss out on all the great things I do have, like even just a gorgeous morning, like this with a fantastic view, as I get ready to go and do some work for the day and plan what’s next. I have opportunities in front of me. 

So I challenge each of you, whatever your circumstances are right now, take out a pen and paper and forget the crap. Forget the stuff that weighs us down. Forget the drama, forget the phone call from someone saying, Oh my gosh, can you believe what just happened?

And write down all the things you have to be grateful for, and do it again tomorrow and the next day and the day after and keep doing it until you find yourself in a place where you spend more time being happy and grateful for the amazing things we have in life every single day, regardless of the crap and BS that’s going on around us. 

Cause you know what? We all have it. Everybody, everybody has unfair things going on in their life. Everybody has challenges. Everybody has things that five years from now you’ll look back at it and laugh and be like, I cannot believe I allowed that to consume so much of my energy. So stop letting it. Live in the awesome, that’s my challenge for you today. And you know what, if you can’t say “ouch” say “Amen”.

Let’s change our mindsets and stop living in a place of it’s not fair and why me. Instead, If it’s going to be, it’s up to me.

Hey, some diamonds go on rings and other diamonds dominate them. Let’s dominate the ring of life together.

I have a free Facebook group for women where I share motivational video’s, workouts, meal planning, Skin care and most importantly women’s personal protection. Follow this link to join.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/189252658263222/

Keep Calm And Carry On

Sometimes things mean different when you look at them versus when you dig deeper and get to know them. Such is the story of my                                                                                      grandmother.IMG_1977She is an immigrant from England and I was really close with her growing up. One interesting habit she had that I remember was she was deathly afraid of thunderstorms. She would call my mom to send me or my sister over to her house whenever there was a thunderstorm or when a siren signal came as warning for an approaching tornado. My mothers was frustrated because she wanted her kids close whenever that happens.

A visit with my grandmother and my family over to England helped us understand the reason for her fear. One time we visited the white cliffs of Dover and we even visited the bomb shelters during the world war 2 which barely had coverage compared to our basement at home. There was also the Dover experience where they will give you a simulation of what it was like living through World War 2. My grandmother couldn’t even go in. We heard the sounds of planes overhead, bombs dropping and sirens wailing. That’s when we realized that the sound of the thunderstorms reminded my grandmother of bombs and the siren was very much like it was during World War 2. My grandfather was a British Air Force pilot and was even a prisoner of war so I can just imagine how traumatic those memories were for my grandmother. What was just a normal thunderstorm for us was clearly something else for my grandmother.

IMG_2471As I was reading about that time in England’s history, I came upon an interesting and inspirational story. During World War 2, the British government released posters to uplift the morale and inspire the people. The first one was distributed on September 1939 and it read, “Your courage, your cheerfulness, your resolution will bring us victory.” The 2nd one that came out was “Freedom is in peril, defend it with all your might.” The last poster that was meant to be released should the invasion of Germany happen was supposed to be          “ Keep calm and carry on.”  Now I know a lot of you are familiar with this saying. It is all over bookstores printed on notebooks, key chains, notepads, frames, posters. It is practically everywhere and has now different variations even. I personally didn’t like it as first glance. I just thought that this quote didn’t have a punch. What was the inspiration to it? It’s only upon learning the deeper meaning of where this quote was from that I realized it’s importance. It was meant to be realized at a time when England’s future was unsure. There were enemy planes overhead, bombs dropping, family members died fighting for the country, and Hitler was about invade. The message was to keep calm and carry on. Because that’s what you have to do when you’re scared.

Keep calm, control your emotions, control your fear. I have a responsibility to keep calm and keep my mind together and use clarity and not let the emotions of the moment dictate how I respond. It applies very much to what is happening to us today. Now this is not a political post at all. This is a reminder for everyone that we all have to carry on. We each have a responsibility and we have to carry on. We cannot let fear paralyze us. Just like in England, they could not let the fear of what was going to happen next paralyze their daily actions.

Now some of you may take this as just a reflection of how you feel things are going in the country, some of you are just very excited about the change. It doesn’t matter where you are this lesson applies to your daily life. We all have bombs that drop in our life and we must accept those and not lose our head. We have people who depend on us. Let’s take it one day at a time. If you can keep calm at the most turbulent parts of your life then you can handle anything.

1 (10)

Subscribe to our mailing list

* indicates required
Email Address *
First Name
Last Name
Email Format

  • html
  • text

</div> <!– real people should not fill this in and expect good things – do not remove this or risk form bot signups–>

</div> </form> </div> //s3.amazonaws.com/downloads.mailchimp.com/js/mc-validate.js(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=’EMAIL’;ftypes[0]=’email’;fnames[1]=’FNAME’;ftypes[1]=’text’;fnames[2]=’LNAME’;ftypes[2]=’text’;}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true); <!–End mc_embed_signup–>”>Don’t miss an update – join the Dimond In The Rough Mailing List Here 

Planning to Swim

So I have been talking about taking out the sinking option in our lives but what does it really mean to learn how to swim figuratively in life? I am not saying that you jump into a lake without prior swimming knowledge and just expect to survive.  There are steps that one should remember.

Step 1. Research and Plan

You can’t just one day decide to be an Olympic power lifter and compete. You need proper training and good coaches and a great team. Before you attempt anything, research and plan. Know the waters you’re jumping into. Understand what you need to take, what level of proficiency you’re gonna need to swim. If you’re starting that business, have a business plan and talk to experts. The amount of preparation that goes into these things are important.

Step 2.Have a fantastic team

I have my mom and dad, Alex & my sons, friends who would encourage me and hold me accountable to my progress and make sure that I was still working towards my goals so I don’t get sidetracked. Their support is invaluable and will help you stick to your vision. When someone crosses the English channel there’s always a boat right next making the journey with them. It always helps to have a life raft of people around  you.

Step 3 Focus

Once you get in you have to focus. Focus on where you’re going. If you look around too much, you get distracted and its harder to keep yourself afloat. It takes more work pushing forward. When I teach kids in Martial Arts, I aways tell them that when you ride a bicycle and you keep looking around, most likely you’re gonna crash. You have to keep your eyes on the track or you won’t succeed.

Step 4 Have Confidence

About 15 years ago I took a Lifeguarding course with my coworker who was a six foot 2 fellow and I had to mock save him . While other kids had hundred pound partners, I was lugging across a man who was 75 pounds heavier than me. When I thought about how much he weighed he really got heavier and made it hard for me. But when I had confidence that I had the skills to save him,I was able to succeed. You see, you don’t always get to save hundred pound kids, sometimes you have to lug around a man twice your size. Just like our problems, sometimes they are more than we think we can handle but if you have the confidence to face them and you know that you have the skills then its winning half the race.

Some Diamonds Go On Rings, Some Dimonds Dominate Them. Will You Join Me in Dominating the Rings of Live? A. img_0102

Will You Swim?

In life you either sink or you swim.  But Im not a sinking kind of person so I have my own version of this famous quote. In my life, its either I swim or I learn to swim. There is no sinking option.

A while back we were looking for potential employees to add to our team who were very eager to join us because it was their dream or their passion. And so we trained them and  I was very excited when the time came to offer the job because it was a great oIMG_8099opportunity for them and looking back when I was starting at this, I would have been thrilled to be in the position that they are now, following their dreams and their passion.When the opportunity came however,  they were hesitant because they thought they were
comfortable at where they are now. One of the concerns was failing and not wanting to take the risk.

And this made me think, you can’t just give up something that doesn’t work. You have to work with it and have a plan. On the other hand I have another team member, Ms Sarah who absolutely rocked the opportunities given to her. She started at the elementary end of it where it wasn’t as glamorous and went through all the hard work to get to where she is. Im proud listening to her speak with passion about her job and embracing all the challenges and difficulties to get to where she is now.

There are times though when you have to step back. You have to recognize that getting on the boat is not sinking. Its recognizing that maybe now is not the time or that this isn’t the course you thought you wanted. When I was a teenager, I spent my high school years committed to the fact that  I was gonna be a professional musician but I kinda got into a different ocean. IMG_8097 I still have the music element in my life but I recognize that’s not where my best gift is. Being able to run my martial arts schools and communicating with you in the community and helping other martial arts school owners to succeed, thats my strongest gift. Its when you allow the challenges and the adversities around you to drown you. That’s sinking. That’s giving up.

When you allow everything else to have control of your decisions, that’s sinking.

So when you look at the road ahead, please remember that quitting is not an option. You always go into the challenge with full force ahead, learn it, embrace it, improve yourself. If I thought of failures even before I started my business then I wouldn’t be where I am today. I would be sinking before I had even learned to swim. So, revise the quote in your heads. There is no sinking option in life. Swim, or Learn to Swim.

 Loving my Blogs? Don’t miss the next one! Register HERE to be the first to know when the next blog releases! PLUS you get my Excuse Proof Kitchen time saving HACKS FREE!

1 Tip To Help You Crush Goals Like Never Before

bees kneesHave you ever heard that Bumblebees can’t fly? According to the laws of aerodynamic the bee’s body weight and shape in relation to its wing spread makes flying impossible. Now a few years ago they finally found the reason why they could fly. Bumblebees just flap their wings harder! 

They use brute force to overcome their own physical shortcomings in order for them to be able to fly. Now nobody told the bee they can’t so they just did it.

Its admirable how they have become a  great role model and have also come to symbolize what I’m all about. If you notice I have been using a play on words with the hashtag buzzellup and the bumblebee icon.

When you start your 2016 and you’re making your goals you have to have the mentality of the bee. Just go for it. There are things around you that may discourage you or hold you back but if you believe in what you can do and just keep pushing then you will reach your goal. The world is full of unnecessary noise that may distract you, society can be tough, and even you can be tough on your own self sometimes, but if you have that determination and you keep flapping your wings harder then you will always succeed.

Bees don’t hang around by the water cooler talking about what this other bee did.They are so well known for their amazing work ethic that they have been used in complimentary terms like “ Busy as a bee” which means that you’re working hard and “ bees knees” which refers to something or someone as the best or of the highest quality. Its very important that you also have that mindset. If it takes brute force to get your work done then put it in. Identify your objectives and work towards it. Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do it.

One thing that’s also admirable about the bumblebee is they have a balanced goal structure.When its time to work, its time to work. And when its time to do something else, its time to do something else.

So the next time you see a bumblebee flying, remember what it had to overcome and remember that like them, you too can overcome challenges, have amazing work ethic and most importantly, believe that you can fly.

Feb 21
Ready for more – Register for my FREE video on my best tips to short cuts to keeping your kitchen excuse proof in 2016

My Top Insecurities

It is the start of a new year and we find ourselves thinking about what we would like to accomplish or  things that we would like to improve about ourselves. It is almost like a ritual with every unfolding of the year that we begin to list our resolutions as well. I was  just listening to a leadership training by John Maxwell and one thing that caught my attention was this, “ You cannot change until you have fully accepted who you are.”  This is a very powerful concept especially at a time when we are all trying to make our new year’s resolution.

If we analyze this statement, to achieve acceptance of something we must first be knowledgeable about it. Before we accept, we should first know ourselves. It sounds almost easy.  When faced with a questionnaire about our favorite color, or our favorite book or movie, it is easy to answer right? But for some, aside from the basic questions, we find ourselves stumped for answers.What are our strengths and weaknesses, What are our dreams, goals, passions, What makes us happy or sad. Even those that are difficult to admit like the bad parts of us, we have to acknowledge them as part of us. For example, I know that I’m bad when it comes to focus. I have ADHD-like tendencies so its hard for me to sit still. Tasks that involve those or things of that nature will always be a challenge for me. I also get loud and inappropriate at all the wrong times and I don’t have the best social graces. These are the parts that I know and acknowledge about myself.

But instead of taking this knowledge as an advantage, I would use it to compare myself to others. I always wished I was a little bit more graceful or dignified and meek. I used to look at those people and wished I could be more like them. I felt that I was a bad version of even myself. Many of us today struggle with this hate. We are so quick to criticize and see the worst in ourselves. We are so quick to compare. I was constantly running through a wall and beating myself up. I was running into frustrations after frustrations because  the reality is we are never gonna be that other person. It’s like wanting an apple when what you’ve got is an orange. The sooner we accept this , the sooner we can move on from this wall that hinders us.

My ADHD mentality is what makes me creative and be the best at my field. I know that now. I know that I have to be conscious  not to be loud at inappropriate times but I know that this is my personality and there are times where its okay for me to own it. Even when making my videos. There was a time when I didn’t want to take a video of myself or pictures of myself. I was self conscious of the sound of my own voice or the awkward facial expressions or if my hair  isn’t perfect that day.

There’s so many areas about myself that like others I am insecure about. But I know I have to push past them and allow myself to develop. The goal of the change is to help us be the best version and not to change into someone we’re completely not. But before we can do this, we have to first, know ourselves and then accept ourselves. The best piece of advice you will ever receive is to love yourself. We are not the model in the magazine or the actor on tv or that athlete in the news. They are also facing their own challenges and working towards it.

Take the time to really know yourself and accept it, love it.Embrace it. Your are awesome in your own way. If you make changes, make changes to be the best version of YOU. When we have freedom to be ourselves, that’s when we all fit together as a whole.

ig1
Register for my inspirational emails

Let It Go..

 

Over the weekend, my niece had her 8th birthday at our house and the theme was Frozen. If you don’t know this movie then you’ve been living under a rock as it took over the entire world. Every kid would sing to the soundtrack and little girls would be begging to be Elsa or Anna for their Halloween costumes. I have a huge level of respect for my  parent friends of little girls who have been watching and listening to the soundtrack over and over again. IMG_7297

One of the songs, Let it go, got me thinking about some of the things that have happened in my life. I really related to the scenario in the movie where Elsa had to keep her real self hidden from the world. I, too was in the same position growing up. In my late teens and early twenties, I somehow felt that I had to keep to my natural personality from the world as it was something that other people wouldn’t approve of. I tried to be, as the song says “the good girl I was meant to be.” Back then, I was already drawn to Martial Arts and Jiu Jitsu. Athleticism for girls, in my circles, was something that wasn’t encouraged back in the day. I encountered a lot of negativity for my choices, even for my parenting choices and my family choices.

I had such a huge wall to overcome and I’m glad that I separated myself from all that. I also want to challenge everyone to be introspective. Learn about your own self, learn what you like, what are your passions, dreams, your dislikes, your fears and own them. Do not be afraid to wear your own personality. You are not what others think of you. Do not allow other people’s opinions of you be your basis for your own self worth. Don’t let the hold you back from what you want to be. We are all different and we all have different ways of coping with our life. Be proud of your individualism. I’m glad that I was able to break away because the person I am now, I absolutely love. I get do my passion everyday. I get to live the life I secretly dreamed about because I went for it. Do something about your passion, do something about your interests, whether you want to learn a new hobby, you want to change your career, or you want to embark on a weight loss journey. Live life on your own standards. Remember that the only person who’s gonna be there for you is yourself so start investing on YOU!

IMG_5963